I think most of us approach the idea of sharing the care of an elder with a lot of trepidation. We have cared for them with one-on-one loving attention. We know their history, their preferences, their tempers and their needs. Bringing others, no matter how experienced, into the equation is counter-intuitive.
Author, speaker, columnist and eldercare consultant
- If
possible, talk nicely with the CNA or hands-on person you think may
need some direction. Talk kindly, and take some of the load off by
saying, "Mom can be sensitive, and I know that. Is there a better way we
can handle this?" - If you don't get
anywhere with that (all of this advice only applies if there isn't
obvious abuse – if that is so, skip to the last step), talk with the
floor supervisor, often a nurse. - If
that still doesn't get you a listening ear and some change – and if you
are being realistic about your requests – then talk with the home
administrator. - If talking doesn't get you anywhere, write a letter and state the complaint and say that you will be contacting your state ombudsman.
An ombudsman is an independent advocate who handles consumer complaints
about government-regulated agencies. Since nursing homes are
government-regulated agencies, they qualify. Assisted living centers may
not, but it's worth a try. Then
do so. You can go online to your state's website and look up aging
services or you can go to the national site and find the National Long
Term Care Ombudsman Resource Center at www.ltcombudsman.org.
You will then type in the location of the home and you will find
contact information. Carry through, and this person will investigate.
